It has been one crazy week in the life of this crutch-girl! Whew! The week included baking, babysitting, having a birthday, and seeing my sister playing Natalie in the show Next to Normal(which, by the way, is pretty much the most amazing show in the universe). It was a wonderful week of exciting things, but I guess all the fun had to end sometime!
After taking the month of January off from school because of the nasty weather (among other things), I finally returned to campus yesterday. It has been a whirlwind of emotions since coming back. While I am very glad to be continuing my education and doing something productive with my time, I also miss the opportunities I had back home. I felt more free there, whereas here…I just feel trapped.
Don’t get me wrong, I love learning. I love being in a classroom environment and being enlightened about so many cool and interesting things, but being on campus all day, every day, has its drawbacks. I can’t drive, so that takes away the option of getting out a bit, or even just going to a coffee shop to study (yes, there is one on campus, but it’s not the same). I like getting out and being just one of the crowd, not tied to anything or anyone. But here, everyone knows that I am a student and I’m on crutches, so it’s hard to just be myself.
Which brings me to the next point…the crutches. It seems that many people see me only for my crutches and not for who I am as a person! I had my first Spanish class of the semester today, and rather than asking my name or something else, she asked what I did and how I got hurt. Like, I get that it’s kind of a big “elephant in the room,” and people are curious, but it’d be nice to be singled out for something other than my disability. Ya know?!
The sidewalks are still ridiculously slippery, which does nothing to ease my anxiety about being here. I have to look carefully at where I am going so I don’t hit a patch of ice or slush. I feel bad for the people who walk behind me, but I don’t have any other choice and I just don’t feel like having a trip to the ER today, thank you very much.
This evening I begin my night class, which is Kinesiology. It’s supposed to be about developing programs for people with special needs or disabilities(no, the students aren’t all disabled; it’s about leading people who are), so I’m curious about how it will go. If it involves physical activity by us students then I might have to drop it, but I’ll make that decision after I see what it’s going to be like. I’m already thinking I’ll be judged for trying to take this class since I am on crutches, but whatever. The opinions of others don’t really matter much to me, especially when it comes to my leg.
Wow, this seems so negative! Hmm…something good that happened…oh, I worked on new crutch covers and put glow in the dark tape on my crutches, so that’s pretty fun! My roommate and I decided to make a “positivity board” to hang in our room and remind us to stay positive and think of the good things in life, so maybe I’ll put that on there. Even the little things count 🙂
Well, I’m going to try to figure out what to do for the next several hours before my class! Stay safe, everyone 🙂
College on Crutches 